So its Summer and you think your DVR is going to be empty, well fear not because the summer TV season has a bunch of good stuff returning a few new shows that look promising. These are my picks for you to watch!

Mad Men The three-time winner of the Golden Globes returns, and we see how Don and company fare with their new agency. Premieres: AMC 7-25-10

Futurama The Fox animated show finds a new home at Comedy Central for its sixth season and Lela still only has one eye. Premieres: Comedy Central 6-24-10

True Blood Sookie and a werewolf are appointed by Eric to track down the missing Bill. Premieres: HBO 6-13-10

The C Word Not that word! Laura Linney is a woman who changes the way she lives her life after a cancer diagnosis. Um…that’s where the C comes in. Premieres: Showtime 8-16-10

The Gates It’s like Desperate Housewives with the sexy Kate Beckinsale as the lead and vampire shenanigans! (Are we not yet bored to “death” by vampires?) Premieres: ABC 6-20-10

Top Chef: DC In a bid to get closer to the Obama kitchen table the Bravo series is going to DC! Expect a bunch of cheese dishes. Premieres: Bravo 6-16-10

Friday Night Lights It’s a show you should be watching. Its currently on Fridays at 8pm on NBC and probably the most real and amazing show about small town life on TV.  Premieres: NBC Currently on.

Work of Art: The Next Great Artist In what appears to be a lazy trend of “competitive” reality television along comes a show so broad that it could be called “Just looking for any guy who can draw”. Premieres: Bravo 6-9-10

So You Think You Can Dance? It’s back and Mia Michaels replaces Mary Murphy so expect a bunch of quotes about “feelings” and “Not being a needy dancer”. Premieres: Fox 5-27-10

Hell's Kitchen Where Chef Ramsey will yell at you for burning the risotto! Premieres: Fox 6-1-10

The Little Couple Little couple Bill and Jen have more adventures than you can shake a stick at! Premieres: TLC 6-1-10

Tosh.0 Tosh is back ripping on you for trying to make it as the internet’s next big thing. Babies dancing to Beyonce need not apply. Premieres: Comedy Central 6-2-10

Rescue Me This is the year Tommy makes everything right or just drinks more. Premieres: FX 6-29-10

I’m finally at that point when I’m ready to go on the job hunt in a “recovering” economy. I’m nervous thinking about what might be out there in the world, but I’m also very excited to find out what life is like beyond my small view. There are no guarantees that I will end up anywhere near my Media Technology concentration, but I’m optimistic that I will get something that makes me truly happy. I enjoy working more than just about anything else, so long days at the office wouldn’t be a horrible thing. I feel like whatever may come my way that it should at least be interesting and slightly creative. The “A” goes with “B” thing really just isn’t what I like to do. I want a challenge that will push me to meet deadlines and the rush of creating something from just an idea. I’m taking it slow because I don’t want to rush into just anything- it has to be the right job at the right time. I want to maybe get an awesome internship at a PR firm or Marketing project. At this point in life I can really go anywhere and do anything so why am I letting my ambition take a backseat to my fears? It’s natural to have some fear, but it shouldn’t take over your life. I sometimes let it take over my life because I don’t know anything beyond what I’m currently doing. I try to focus on the good and live a life that has meaning, but my thoughts sometimes cloud my intuition. I’m too nervous to take the next step and I just can’t sit back and watch what happens either. I’m a little lost, which sadly is nothing new, but I have a feeling that maybe things are about to turn around. Hopefully.

It’s summer and the wind is lightly blowing outside as the temperature rises. I’m indoors looking at a blank screen not sure what to write. I’m currently thinking about the future. What it means to map out your life and try to follow it like a set of directions. I try not to imagine a distinct future because I ultimately don’t want to let myself down. I worry about the idea of “success” because I feel once you reach it that you have to create another set of goals.  I’m not sure what comes after achieving a dream. Are you supposed to have an entire book of dreams or a single one? Each day is starting to feel the same, I see the same people and have the same conversations. It wouldn’t matter where I lived because each day plays out similarly. Is this why we have dreams in the first place? Without dreams does it feel you’re not going anywhere or is it all relative? We want to be on a path or otherwise we are deemed useless to society. My path feels crowded with other people moving in the same direction spouting the same dumb ideology about the importance of power and success (or is that excess). I’m free falling half of the time not understanding how much music plays an important part in drowning out the noise of my thoughts. It’s true that I over think everything to the point where it doesn’t matter to me anymore. I hear that the weather is Spain is nice this time of year and maybe that is the direction my life should head. It wouldn’t matter because it’s a dream and ultimately that makes it important. How conversational of me to find the meaning behind a thought process so natural and nonsensical. I don’t know why I have dreams, but I do and that makes the path so much more fulfilling, but if I didn’t have any dreams wouldn’t the path still be as interesting? Soon I will get to a point where the path doesn’t matter anymore and the dreams become irrelevant because such little time is left. The natural progression of life and feelings are almost overwrought with irony and sadness. A part of me can’t wait to get to that point where it doesn’t matter anymore and that I know that it never did.

 

He wears thick black brimmed glasses and a white pocket square.

He likes buttermilk in the morning, but only after a cup of coffee.

He works as a janitor three times a week.

He mops beige hallways that smell like lemon lime and mildew.

He can never find matching socks so he buys just white ones.

He laughs out loud to reruns of M.A.S.H.

He thinks the smell of cinnamon is nauseating.

He met his girlfriend on-line while shopping for comic books.

He thinks if she were a flower than she would be a tulip.

He tried to kiss her on their first date while riding a tilt-a-whirl.

He secretly wishes he knew how to whistle.

He once had a dream that he met Al Gore while swimming for the national polo team.

He thinks he’s allergic to blueberry muffins.

He wears brown shoes with red laces.

He had his first kiss by a red ant hill.

He once smashed a snow globe against the hood of a ford mustang.

He chews with his mouth open.

He cried at the end of Casablanca.

He has a Spiderman bandage on his left knee from tripping on a fire hydrant.

He kisses his girlfriend and thinks about cotton candy.

He thinks his girlfriend secretly hates his hair.

He once added blue food coloring to his eggs.

He dreams about flying away in a hot air balloon.

He wonders why he can’t propose.

He thinks he’s just not in love.

Part 1: An Introduction

I can kind of remember what it was like coming to America for the first time. I was really young so my thoughts might be cloudy. I was born in Baja off the cost and I was brought to America when I was five. I can remember Palm Springs being sort of like a movie set with endless palm trees and shiny rocks instead of sand. I remember a windmill farm with hundreds of white windmills turning in the dessert air. I remember the dessert sun burning up the sky with reds, yellows, and blues. I was nervous to meet my new family and start a new life, but I was excited as well. I believe it was a very hot day and the air conditioner in the case workers car made a loud rattling sound. The seats were leather and stuck to me as I intently stared out the window. I can remember smiling more than being sad…I don’t think I was aware that I would never see my mother again, but I was happy to have left all the horrible stuff behind me. When we pulled into the drive way the first thing that I noticed is that the house was yellow and a single palm tree was growing in the front yard. It looked peaceful and tranquil and nothing like what I had seen back home. I walked to the front door holding the case workers hand and suddenly I felt a rush of emotions because I had no idea what future was behind that door. To be continued…

1st picture ever taken of me.

I fight to write.

I fight to believe and understand.

I fight for freedom and vision.

I fight for the creative.

I fight to see the sunshine.

I fight to run through the rain.

I fight for success.

I fight to live each day.

I fight to wake up each morning.

I fight to always stay happy.

The summer is upon us and what better time to play catch up on everything old and new. Of course due to busy schedules and a heavy primetime schedule many movies we just didn’t have time to see, so here is my summer watching list: Things I will / want / can’t decide if I should watch this summer. Hopefully I will have some time to get these off of my list soon:

The Lovely Bones: Though it came out to middling reviews and a somewhat lackluster box office. I still find myself wanting to see what vision Peter Jackson brings to this story.

An Education: It had some major Oscar buzz, but sadly was overshadowed by flashier films. I just hope Peter Sarsgard can overcome that horrible “The Orphan” movie he was in.

Shutter Island: You must pay respect to a master artist like Martin Scorsese and his idea of horror will no doubt be revealing.

Inception: A horrifyingly good trailer looks like a must watch for me. It is a bonus that Christopher Nolan brings this movie after the creative success of The Dark Knight.

Salt: I can only hope that this is better than Angelina Jolie’s last action pic “Wanted”, but she has nowhere to go but up.

The Last Airbender: Though I know that M. Night Shyamalan has had one disappointment after another- I hope he can bring the characters to life from a cartoon off of Nickelodeon without seeming desperate for a summer blockbuster.

I’m sure there are more, but this is my short list for really interesting movies that have made it on my radar. Of course summer movie junk like Iron Man 2 will no doubt fill a couple hours of my life, but junk food is the best part of summer.

                 

The end of the year came like a whirlwind of long hours putting projects together and last minute cramming to finish tests, but overall it has been a great year. I did work that I’m proud of and I felt that this semester I have gotten a lot of valuable life information from my classes. Media Management had more depth than I originally imagined it would and it wasn’t difficult as much as just interesting. Media Writing II was a bit on the boring side and sometimes too focused on singular ideas, but news writing isn’t a creative art. I can’t say that I really enjoyed that class- I also can’t say that I’m a good writer either. JavaScript formatting was by far the most frustrating and difficult class I have ever had. Things didn’t work the way they should and so many issues with cross compatibility really made it a pain. I did learn so much more about JavaScript, but it felt like it was at a price. I don’t think it’s anything that I’m ever going to 100% excel in. PR and Marketing was very interesting and I can now right a very decent press release- at times I loved this class more than I could have imagined and then I could turn around a hate everything it represents. I enjoy the work behind PR, but I’m really not the kind of guy to go around selling myself or my ideas. Introduction for Designers was a great web application class that allowed me to work strict XHTML into my JavaScript (whenever it decided to work properly) and gave me a sense of completion to many of the projects I had started in Intro to Website design. Overall the year was incredible and I feel more fulfilled than I have in the past, but things still linger for me. The idea of how I have no idea how this will all turn out still brings some fear, but I can’t really think about it too much. I don’t care if life doesn’t have meaning, but I do care if I’m at least making a positive impact. Next semester will bring in field work and broadcasting until graduation where all the questions will be up in the air and I’m sure I will still have no answers.

              It has been a while since I’ve written anything. It has just been busy or maybe I don’t have anything meaningful to write. If you think about life and death and how it lingers in the back of our thoughts- you begin to wonder if each step you make has any real importance. Time is never on our sides as we strive for moments of happiness through the lull of everyday existence, but in moments of true stillness you feel yourself thinking. You think about everything that is important to you and all the things that may never make sense to you, but most of all you think about happiness. What will bring me true happiness? Does it matter? Is the reality I’m currently in the only thing that matters? All these questions may fill the void, but few have any resonance or solution. I can’t help but think about these things all the time.

               It feels like the dreams we have tend to give us less meaning over time. Death is a very real notion, but it brings up complex feelings of doubt in the choices you have made through life. What is the most important part of life? Is it raising your children or loving your family? Does it have nothing to do with you? For me the aspects of life that have most meaning are are hard to define. When your proud of an accomplishment or when something unnervingly moves you to a point of pure distraction. Its these moments that build meaning. I can remember times such as when I was adopted that created a sense of belonging and love. Though the idea of being adopted quickly faded because I was just part of the family- these moments had meaning and gave me a sense of hope for feeling something about something. As vague as that may sound there are moments that play through our minds over and over again, whether they are positive or negative doesn’t matter because they create meaning. We all search for meaning and a way to express what we feel and I guess it’s the journey that matters the most. I recently heard of a friend that had passed away and thought about all the meaning they gave that they may never have been aware of and that life is sometimes cruel in that fact.